Sunday, November 17, 2013

Thus spaketh the prophet:

3 Truths and 2 Lies game answers. Yesterday I gave these statements and you were supposed to guess the truths and the lies: 1. I was once a truck driver and a cook for military cadets. 2. I was kicked out of a bear group for marching with them in leather. 3. I was skipped forward a grade in high school. 4. I was the flower girl at a wedding once. 5. I taught a Grammy award winner's child in Sunday school. Here are the realities... 1. True. I drove truck on the west coast for half a year with my best friend. When his health needed him to quit, we both took residence in Tucson. Also when living in Louisville, KY, I had a position in a hotel that housed military cadets before they were shipped out. I cooked them breakfast and drove them to the recruiters. 2. False. In fact I am the one who began the bear group, Kentuckiana Kodiaks, and when my partner at the time and I designed the makeshift float for Louisville's first gay pride event, I did march in leather (which none of the actual leather group's people had the guts to do, which is why when they saw me they all joined us) and ended up interviewed by the local paper. PS: Never start a bear group. I didn't get kicked out. I got sick of it and told them all to go fuck off because I was sick of their drama, having more than enough from my partner at the time. 3. False. It'll surprise people who think I'm intelligent to find out that I had to repeat 10th in fact. But this is from skipping it in my home town of Houston, TX and missing most of the year. I repeated it in Calico Rock, Arkansas, where I wasn't as terrified of the violence. 4. TRUE!!! No, I'm not kidding. For as long as I remember when people said they were getting married, I always joked that I wanted to be their flower girl. At a pagan gathering a couple planning their hand-fasting and wedding actually took me up on it, provided I brought the flowers. I picked them from a local field. 5. True. In my crazy cult known as the Atlanta Church of Christ, we actually baptized grammy winner Speech, lead "singer/rapper/whatever" of the old group, Arrested Development. I really hated their music, and I really REALLY hated all the favoratism that they showed him when they could give a shit about anybody who was poor. Forced to deal with kids, I had to teach his little boy, Thomas, in Sunday school. Thankfully he was adorable and well behaved.